It's not a lack of willpower — screens are designed to be engaging. Understanding what makes them so compelling helps you create boundaries that work for your family.
Phones • Tablets • TVs • Gaming • Laptops
Every Parent Has Heard This
This phrase has been said in every household since screens existed. Along with "I'm almost done," "But I'm not doing anything wrong," and the classic — "You're always on YOUR phone too." Sound familiar?
For the last five or six years teaching in schools, I've been explaining to parents in workshops that it's not about the quantity, but the quality. And that's still true. But now that I'm working from home, the story has completely changed for me personally. Getting the right setup, the right balance, the ability to step away from the screen and move back into the real world — it makes a massive difference.
I thought by reducing gaming, I had cracked it. Then I realised I was working about 10 hours a day on a screen. And to relax in the evening? I was too tired to even watch TV. My usual ways of unwinding just weren't working anymore. I had to find a new balance. If a screen time expert can struggle with this, imagine what your child is going through.
It's not just about hours — it's about how screens affect them
No. And in our assessment call, I'll happily tell you the times where using screens is more than okay — particularly when travelling. Long car journeys with kids constantly asking "are we there yet?" are exhausting for everyone. My own childhood was great partly because I could zone out with music during travel, enjoy the world, and think my own thoughts. The guilt parents feel about screen use often comes from unrealistic expectations. What matters is the overall pattern, not every individual moment.
This is the real problem modern parents face. You're not just dealing with screen time at home — you're dealing with it at school too. Homework requires laptops, research means internet access, and suddenly the device you're trying to limit is also essential for education. The huge dilemma is how to balance necessary screen use with healthy limits. This requires strategies that distinguish between productive and recreational use — and that's exactly what we work out together in our call.
This is understandable — and more common than you think. Parents are used to seeing generic advice on social media that tells you how to set up controls. However, it doesn't actually tell you how to undo the damage that's already happened. None of us were really aware of how quickly screen habits could form. It's only now we can look back and see the patterns. But I can help you address what's already there, not just prevent future problems.
If you're looking for a magic number, you won't find one that works for every child. One hour of educational content is completely different from one hour of mindless scrolling. The real question isn't how many hours, but what they're doing with that time. If it's beneficial or educational, you might want your child to do more. But if they're using screens because they're bored — that's where the problem comes in. It's about purpose, not just minutes.
Honest answers about the questions parents actually ask
If you're looking for a magic number, you won't find one that works for every child. One hour of educational content is completely different from one hour of mindless scrolling. The real question isn't how many hours — it's what they're doing with that time and how it's affecting them.
A child using screens for creativity and learning needs different limits than one who reaches for a device out of pure boredom. Context matters more than hours.
In our assessment, I look at YOUR child's actual usage patterns — what they're doing on screens, how it's impacting their sleep and mood, and what it's replacing in their life. Then I'll tell you exactly what "too much" looks like for YOUR family and give you specific limits that actually make sense.
Honestly, no. And I say this as someone who did a complete seven-day digital detox to understand what total removal actually feels like. If you're advising parents on screen time, you should know the experience firsthand. It caused massive changes I wasn't prepared for.
Complete bans rarely work long-term and can create more problems than they solve — including resentment and sneaky behaviour. The goal isn't elimination, it's healthy integration.
In our session, I'll assess whether your current situation needs a temporary reset or a gradual rebalancing — and give you a specific plan that works for YOUR household. No extreme approaches unless they're genuinely needed for YOUR child's situation.
They have their place — but they're not the complete solution most parents hope for. When I was Head of Technology in schools, I realised the sheer amount of time it would take to keep blocking everything every single week. I'd never be able to do any actual teaching.
That's why over 12 years I developed approaches that reduce the amount of parental control tweaking and monitoring you need. Constantly adjusting controls is exhausting and often ineffective.
In our session, I'll show you which controls actually matter for YOUR child's age and devices, which are a waste of time, and — more importantly — I'll give you strategies that mean you don't need to be constantly policing their screens. Less monitoring, better results.
Generic advice tells you to set timers and stick to them. But that doesn't account for the meltdowns, the negotiations, the "just five more minutes" that turns into an hour. Limits that work require understanding why YOUR child struggles to stop and what need the screen is meeting.
The approach that works depends on your child's age, what they're using screens for, and your family's specific situation. There's no one-size-fits-all answer.
In our session, I'll help you set limits that YOUR child will actually respect — and give you specific language to explain WHY in a way that builds understanding rather than resentment. The goal is for them to understand the limits, not just follow them because they have to.
This is the real dilemma modern parents face. You're not just dealing with screen time at home — you're dealing with it at school too. Homework requires laptops, research means internet access, and suddenly the device you're trying to limit is also essential for education.
The challenge is distinguishing between necessary, productive screen use and recreational use that's become problematic. That's harder than it sounds when the same device does both.
In our assessment, I'll help you create specific boundaries that don't interfere with YOUR child's learning while still protecting against the mindless scrolling and gaming that hijacks their attention. We'll work out exactly what's educational, what's recreational, and how to handle the grey areas.
These meltdowns aren't just defiance — there's something real happening in their brain. Screens trigger dopamine release, and being pulled away mid-engagement creates genuine discomfort. Your child isn't being dramatic; they're experiencing a form of withdrawal.
The intensity of the meltdown often depends on what they were doing, how suddenly it ended, and whether they had any warning. But there are ways to transition them off screens without the daily battles.
In our session, I'll help you understand why YOUR child reacts the way they do — looking at what triggers the worst meltdowns and what's actually happening in their brain. Then I'll give you specific transition strategies that work for YOUR child's age and temperament. Not magic, just understanding what's happening and working with it.
I've dealt with screen time issues from every angle — and I've struggled with it myself
12+ years dealing with ALL screen issues every day — laptops, iPads, phones, TVs. I've watched how digital parenting has changed, how the education system has adapted, and how screens have become impossible to avoid.
Working from home, I realised I was spending 10 hours a day on screens — and too tired to even relax with TV in the evenings. I had to find a new balance. If a screen time expert can struggle with this, imagine what your child is going through.
I did a full seven-day cold turkey detox because I believe if you're advising parents on screen time, you should know what total removal actually feels like. It caused massive changes I wasn't prepared for — which is why I don't recommend extreme approaches.
I've developed approaches that reduce the constant parental control tweaking and monitoring that exhausts parents. Not because I wanted to, but because blocking everything every week in schools meant I'd never do any actual teaching. There are better ways.
"When parents feel like they've lost control of their children's tech usage, they can call up Daniel Towle."
— Heather Kelly, The Washington Post
Get a personalized screen time strategy that actually works — no total bans, no constant monitoring, just practical boundaries that protect your child while keeping the peace.